What does that even mean?
We all have behaviors, beliefs, feelings, thoughts, things, and sometimes even people that hurt us, hold us back, hold us down, or keep us stuck. Changing behaviors, beliefs, feelings, and thoughts, as well as letting go of people usually requires a great deal of effort whether it’s physical, emotional, or mental. Although, it is often a combination of the three.
To compound the difficulty of change, life is challenging – stressful work environments, stressful relationships, kids, house, bills, yards, pets, and even friends. Too much going on in our lives, little or no sleep, and adding just one more thing to an already difficult and sometimes crazy, busy schedule can make you feel like your head and body are going to explode or that you are going to fly out of your own skin.
We put ourselves last because we love our children, our partners, our parents, and friends, and we feel the need to take care of them because it is “our job” even if we already have another full-time or part-time job. We end up taking care of others to the point of feeling run down, exhausted, irritable, frazzled, and wishing like a Calgon bath really could take us away. I have certainly fantasized about a white sand beach, a neck and shoulder massage, and a fruity little drink with nothing to do and nowhere to be.
Since so few of us are able to hop on a jet to take us to our idea of paradise, what can we do to combat the never-ending time crunch/struggle with laundry, meals, dishes, messes, kids’ schedules, our own schedules, family time, and jobs? How do we find time for us that is guilt-free, relaxing, and serves to fill up our energy?
Set yourself as THE PRIORITY once a week for fifteen minutes. Give notice to everyone that you are on a time out, barring the house burning down or someone in the house dying. Have the significant other, the grandparents, or a babysitter take charge of everything so you can completely release the feeling that you have to be “on” to handle anything. If that doesn’t work for your lifestyle, then one night a week once everyone is in bed, invest in some you time that is all about pampering yourself. Let go of the guilt about kids or chores or work or anything worrying you.
Put yourself first instead of last.
Devote some energy to yourself because YOU DESERVE IT.
Plus, it can be so easy. Believe me – this feels so good, and it truly is worth it.
So how do we do it?
There are a number of things that we can do that relax us, that don’t take a lot of time, that don’t cost much, and that help us to feel more settled. There are even additional things we can do together as families and/or with the kids that are soothing and enjoyable that help them feel settled, which of course, helps us, too. Just remember – you are the priority here.
If you have just fifteen minutes to half an hour once a week, add a cup of epsom salt, a quarter cup of baking soda and soak in your bathtub. Epsom salt is a great muscle relaxer and pulls lots of stuff from our bodies physically and energetically. Either alone or together with your significant other or for your kids’ bath time – a bath just once a week is a wonderful way to destress and relax; a feeling that you can boost by adding 7 – 10 drops of an essential oil.
Don’t have a bathtub or don’t like baths, no problem. A three-dollar plastic dishpan for a foot bath is also very effective; just add a half-cup epsom salts and two tablespoons of baking soda with three or four drops of essential oil. Try Lavender, Release, Stress Away, Peace & Calming II, Gentle Baby, or M-Grain. Not only do we absorb the oil through our skin, we also breathe it in.
Aromatherapy is a great way to get a dose of relaxation. Inhalation goes right to our brains and into our systems. Think about it this way; scent is our strongest memory activator. The feel of a place that fills you with peace, contentment, and enjoyment is easily rekindled just by a scent that reminds you of that place, person, or time, as for instance, grandma’s pie or the smell of the ocean breeze during summer vacation. You can literally feel your whole body relax and your mood change just by smelling a scent that brings up pleasurable memories. Aromatherapy taps into our brains and our bodies and certain singles or blends of essential oils help provide much needed calm and serenity during stressful times.
Diffusing essential oil in a room can create a soothing atmosphere. You can also combine it with a carrier oil, like olive or avocado for a much needed massage for muscles. Temples, jaw, neck, shoulders, legs, and/or feet often hold a lot of tension. Gently massaging these areas with an essential/carrier oil combination is a wonderful and easy way to destress and relax, or if you have someone to whom you are close – the soothing touch of someone we love and trust is relieving and relaxing.
These three tips are excellent activities to try at bedtime for better sleep. Let it (whatever it is) go, and let it (your connection to yourself and to the present moment) flow! Let it go, and let it flow!
Keep you, your family, and your home clean and clear so positive energy can keep flowing, and you can feel calmer.
In our homes and in our own heads, we often have a lot going on: work, family issues, drama, and a plethora of other things that keep us and our energy spinning in harmful patterns that affect how we feel in our bodies, with our family members, and in our space.
When we have all of these upsetting thoughts and emotions, or stressors, we often feel as if we are all running round and round in our heads with thoughts that trigger our bodies until we reach the snapping point. Sometimes, it feels as if our bodies are literally vibrating and that we are going to come apart if just one more thing happens.
However, when we are feeling calm and peaceful, our moods are mellow, our bodies and minds are relaxed, we have more availability and resources to deal with those unexpected issues that always crop up in day to day life.
We can help create and maintain a calmer and much more peaceful atmosphere by placing crystals in certain locations. Choose a room or rooms that are most often used or that have a lot of stressors, such as home office, den, or kitchen. Place a good quality crystal on your fireplace mantel, on or in front of your computer, on bedside tables, the kitchen table, and/or by the front door.
There are crystals that are really great for cleaning up negative and neutral energies while releasing positive energy that can make a big difference in how you and your home feel. Try Amethyst, Blue-Grey Celestite, green Diopside, Healer’s Gold quartz, or Selenite.
Another relaxing and relieving activity is time spent outdoors. Leave the cell phone at home and take a walk by yourself, with your significant other, or the whole family, talking about nothing in particular. Leave all your worries at home. Just breathe in the fresh air and try to figure out what you are smelling (hopefully, something pleasant). See the sky and sun, or the rain and the clouds. Listen to the sounds you hear. Feel the air on your skin and the ground beneath your feet. Check into all five of your senses and let the tension melt off of you as you walk. In as little as ten minutes, feel the shift in your mood, your energy, and your body. Carry that feeling home with you.
Lastly, a nightly routine that prepares us to sleep is hugely beneficial. In as little as fifteen minutes we can step ourselves down from a beta state to a delta state. Beta brain waves are a state of highly focused attention with intense mental activity while alpha brain waves indicate physical relaxation but mental awareness (meditation state). In the theta state we are both mentally and physically relaxed and ideas just flow easily, and in delta state we are asleep. Try listening to a sound track of nature sounds, instrumentals, or a guided meditation to allow yourself to move from a state of frenetic thoughts to deep sleep.
The Insights Timer App has a large variety of selections, such as guided meditations, instrumentals, binaural beats, singing bowls, chants, and nature tracks. You are also able to choose sound track, time lengths ranging from five minutes to over an hour. The app is free and available on Google or Apple. At the end of the night, select a track that relaxes you. When the track is done, the app just goes into standby mode. You don’t have to turn it off or worry about being interrupted once you reach the delta (sleep) state; so you can just set your phone to do not disturb, get comfortable, and float away.
Change, even just, an incremental change can make a tremendously positive impact on our overall well-being, and our relationship with ourselves and others. So, get out of your head and into your body. Let it (whatever it is) go and let it (your connection to yourself and to the present moment) flow through you.
#Let it go and let it flow.
Ashley Marshall-O’Dell, Sacred Journey